By: Jenifer Chrisman
“In this life we cannot always do great things. But we can do small things with great love.”
– Mother Teresa
There are a variety of definitions associated with the term, but, generally speaking, an Act of Random Kindness is an action designed to offer kindness toward the outside world (someone other than ourselves) without premeditation or consistency. While this is most often the case, some Acts of Random Kindness require a little more time and forethought. And, post pandemic, Acts of Random Kindness are needed more than ever.
The world has always been crazy, but that craziness seems to have amped up into a steroidal rage. And while kindness continues to exist, too often it feels like we are seeing/hearing/experiencing less and less of it. And yet, even the smallest Act of Random Kindness can make a drastic difference, not just to the person on the receiving end, but to everyone that person comes in contact with from that point forward.
Anyone who drives, especially in a city, has experienced the inability to turn out of a smaller street or parking lot onto a main road. Add in rush hour traffic and the wait can be a long one. But what happens when a car actually stops to let the driver out? I can only speak from my own experience, but I feel a great deal of gratitude. And, even though I don’t consciously think much about it after I put up a hand in thanks, I find myself doing the same, or offering some other sort of kindness, to another random stranger.
And so it goes with Acts of Random Kindness, from a random stranger taking the time to hold a door open to someone letting you line jump when you only have an item or two and they have a cartload. Whether you in turn do something for someone else or it just brightens your day, it pays itself forward.
As previously noted, some acts require a bit more effort. Many years ago, I worked for a company that gave all its employees turkeys or hams for Thanksgiving and Christmas. But, for some reason, they always waited until nearly the last minute to give them out. The first time it happened (two days before Thanksgiving) I had already purchased everything for the meal I was making. To top it off, I didn’t have the room to store it. After a bit of thought I went to the grocery on my way home and picked up the basics for the rest of the meal.
With everything in the car, I stopped by a friend’s (who was going away for the holiday). My friend’s neighbor, a single mother of four who was barely making ends meet, was sending each of her children to different friends’ houses. She wanted them to have a Thanksgiving meal, even though she would be staying home and eating Ramen.
I loitered around outside, chatting with my friend, until her neighbor was passing by. I hate telling lies (even little white ones) but I said something like, “Hey, work gave me a turkey (true) and the basic trimmings (not true) and I already bought all my stuff (true). If you can use it you are more than welcome, otherwise it will just go to waste as I don’t have room in my freezer.”
I knew she wouldn’t have taken the food if she had known I purchased any of it, but after a bit of nonchalance on my part, I finally convinced her. That Thanksgiving, she and her children were able to have a Thanksgiving meal as a family.
The next day, in passing, a couple of my coworkers were complaining they had nowhere to store their turkey/ham (they also had already bought everything). So, I mentioned what I had done. Next thing I knew, straight after work they were at the grocery and dropping the meals off to…I never asked who. Later that year, rather than giving each other gifts for Christmas, we each bought whatever we thought was needed for Christmas dinner to go along with the turkey/ham and quietly donated them. From that point forward, it became a tradition for both holidays.
I cannot begin to describe how blessed each of us felt knowing someone struggling, who otherwise would have done without, was able to share a Thanksgiving/Christmas meal, plus leftovers, with their family. As so…
The ARK Challenge.
1. At least once a week, randomly do something nice for someone, whether a friend, family member or stranger.
2. Ask family and friends to do the same.
3. If at all possible, keep the Act of Random Kindness to yourself, eschewing any need for reciprocity or accolades. Let the gift of your kindness be its gift to you.
4. If the person you have done something for is aware of your kindness and really wants to do something in return, ask them to instead do something nice for someone else.
There are innumerable possibilities (see a small list below). Big or small, each act is a gift we give, not just to others, but to everyone they come in contact with. In all likelihood, we will never know what, if any, ripple effect takes place, but if we want the world to change, we must first look inside ourselves.
Change starts with me. It starts with you. It starts with each of us choosing to make a difference. Just imagine, if each of us took a moment or three out of our day/week and did something nice for someone else, we could, quite literally, change the world.
Acts of Random Kindness
• Donate money to a charity
• Pass on unneeded items to those who have a need
• Donate blood
• Volunteer
• Open doors for others
• Invite a lone diner to join you and your party
• Let a car turn when traffic is making it difficult
• Send flowers to a friend
• Bake cookies for or read to the elderly
• Encourage someone
• Acknowledge a stranger
• Call a friend you haven’t spoken to in a while
• Check in with family members
• Leave money on a vending machine
• Buy the fixings for a holiday meal and pass it on to a family who will go without
• Grab an item for someone struggling to reach it
• Pay for the item(s) of the person behind you in line
• Let the person in line behind you skip ahead
• Help carry groceries
• Return a grocery cart
• Leave a generous tip
• Leave a positive review
• Send a gratitude email or snail mail note
• Thank someone
